Nine of Cups - I Wish...I Hope

Today after spending a restless night, I intentionally sought out some kind of message of comfort, from whatever card I drew this morning, because I've been feeling so sad. It's been a difficult couple of months emotionally with the loss of a long time friend and another dear friend, now in palliative care.

Considering this card, the Nine of Cups it is the best one I could draw, as it's the wish card, representing fruition, comfort and satisfaction.

The truth is, we can make wishes all we want but it doesn't change reality regardless of what is happening in our lives and in the lives of those we love so much. So I don't spend my time wishing. Of course I wish things were different, but they're not and there's nothing else I can do but find a place of acceptance, and forgiveness and instead of wishes, I hope and pray for acceptance of situations that I struggle very much with, because they're so unacceptable. I know I have to let go and trust that the God of my understanding will do what I can't do myself, in order to find the way.

Two of Cups - Overcoming Fear

 Duality, balance, and attraction are the implied indications in the Two of Cups.

I find it curious to note, Eros is sneaking up on Psyche. He seemingly is attempting to take her by surprise but after Eros accidentally pricks himself with the arrow he intended to kill Psyche with, the unexpected result is, Eros falls in love with Psyche and their tumultuous relationship begins.

 As in life we're often surprised and fear the way events unfold. Something we initially might think as being a negative or a positive experience can often lead to a positive or negative outcome, because we've found another door that's opened to us when one has closed, one that we'd never imagined.

It doesn't mean that this all will unfold in an easy manner, and it might be the case that the very opposite will be our reality. We may feel we've gone from the frying pan to the fire and have been completely kicked to the curb, but regardless, the end result will eventually be transformed into something better than what was before or maybe not. We do however have to find a way through.

 On the other hand the unfairness of life, as in nature, many times, makes absolutely no sense, leaving us fearful, confused, dumbfounded and despairing. We are left with the unanswered question, why is this happening?

 I've concluded if I have little to no ability or strength to accept life and death on the their terms,no mine, whatever is presented to me, this is when and what becomes problematic. Acceptance, not denial is always the key that opens a door of hope and freedom enabling me to overcome my fear.

King of Cups - The Ideal Father

The King of Cups is a card of emotional balance. Something that's often hard to find within ourselves.
John Bradshaw once said that 95% of the population is dysfunctional and co-dependent in some way, and the other 5% are in denial.

I remember back in the 80s when I first heard about ACOA Adult Children of Alcoholics and the given description of the behavioral personality characteristics displayed by those who grow up in alcoholic homes. It very accurately described me to a tee and that was just the beginning of my own personal recovery journey.

 I was relieved to learn why it was I'd felt so emotionally imbalanced all my life, and to know I wasn't alone in what I thought was my weirdness. It has hard for me to remember there ever being a time I didn't feel this way, that I didn't belong or that happiness was for everybody else, but it eluded me.

What an incredible relief it was to finally begin to understand why I behaved the way I did, to appreciate, accept and eventually come to love the person I am.

The King of Cups embodies the mythic figure Orpheus the singer. He represents for me the kind of father that most of us envision as being ideal.. He is both priest and healer who seeks to form relationships with others and yet his relationship with himself is lacking in that he doesn't seem to know how to make himself happy. The King of Cups is the image of the Wounded Healer and he is far from perfect.


None of us grow up with an ideal father though it is often easy for us to put them on a pedestal and see them  as perfect, even in the face of abuse, neglect or abandonment in some way.

Forgiveness and acceptance of our fathers as they truly are, comes when we do this not for them, but for ourselves. Then we can begin to love them not in spite of who they are, but because of who they are.

The Star of Hope - How Not to Ruin Your Life

 It's synchronicity that caused me to draw this Major Arcana card, The Star of Hope today. Since I learned of the death of my friend Lillian, I've thought about how death can bring us unexpected inspiration and hope. These are the lessons in the fragility of life, often giving us the deepest sense of meaning that grows out of unhappiness, pain, shame, crisis, depression, and loss.

 Life is full of irony and we can often think that these are unexpected sources of inspiration and personal transformation, but the truth is, they certainly can be. Things aren't always as the appear to be.

 The Star is a card of waiting, which offers hope, urges us to to trust our intuition and to have faith in the midst of difficulties and that there will soon be a dawn.

Life if really about a series of losses, but with loss are also gains, but I believe it depends on our own level of acceptance, grace, and it helps a lot having a really good sense of humour that enables the ability to not take yourself so seriously and can be a powerful healing tool for some.

 J.P Sears has really learned how to do this. Simultaneously he seriously coaches a whole lot of people, helping them to find hope and to understand that pain, shame and broken hearts don't have to ruin our lives.

Listening today to a great program about aging versus ageism, midlife crisis, and transformation I thought the topic this program Out In The Open is aligned with much of the general meaning to be found in The Star.

Two of Swords - Stand Still

 Orestes is between his mother and father, at a standstill and in a state of tense balance. Orestes is between a rock and a hard place. He needs to make a choice about facing and accepting an unpleasant reality.

 The Two of Swords is the second two I've drawn this week. Twos represent duality and this card indicates choice and reaching a stalemate. This card accurately depicts my situation these days and for the next 19 months.

 I've learned the hard way over the years that having the wisdom of patience is always a good approach to take when finding ourselves in whatever situation, that is beyond our control. It never works to attempt to force a solution. Letting things naturally unfold over time relieves us of the stress of anxiety and worry and is a much better choice. Action is the antidote to worry.

 Although I can't do anything to change my situation, I know the action I can take, is to exercise patience and acceptance, patience with and acceptance of myself. If I can do this, I am likely to accept what comes my way in life, living life on life's terms. This doesn't come naturally to people. We mostly want, what we want, now or yesterday, and it sure doesn't happen over overnight to most people. It takes practice over time, little by slowly. So I'll buckle up relax and enjoy the ride. I only have one life to live, so I'd better make it a good one, awake and with my eyes wide open.

The Tower of Pickled Eggs

I don't ever recall drawing this Major Arcana card, The Tower. I know I haven't seen it before in my daily draw. But I do know it's a very relevant card for me today, having learned from a recent experience, after completing a lot of diligent hard work and then easily concluding that circumstances aren't always as they appear to be. The reason I say that was easy to conclude, is a result of having continued to trust my intuition and have the discernment to understand and accept what has happened and was meant to be, and to know  there are better things to come.

I'm actually further ahead than I was before and I'm now relieved of the stress that I was feeling. I think my increased cortisol level was simply a message from my intuition doing it's job, leaving me with that nagging pull or sinking feeling in the pit of my gut. I wasn't exactly sure why, what it meant and how it was going to all turn out, but I kept trusting that all will be revealed, and happily, it was.

When we experience periods of confusion, it can be very stressful and can be compared to going through that Labyrinth of King Minos, and we wonder when that scary, horrible, and gross creature, the Minotaur is going to show up and do his dirty work.

What has all this got to do with pickled eggs you ask? I'll tell you.
 I just finished making a batch of pickled eggs. I carefully placed them in the refrigerator, after making them, where they have to stay for two days before they're ready. Oh I've made them before, but I was usually in a big hurry to make them, skipping steps and certainly not following any recipe and I sure as heck didn't wait for two days for them to be ready!

This batch of pickled eggs I've made today, are going to be like none other I've ever made. I'm absolutely confident they are going to be delicious after paying very careful attention to detail. I took my time and followed the instructions in the recipe, right down to how to properly boil and even peel the eggs.

Discernment, intuition, having trust in that still quiet voice within my psyche, and practicing acceptance is rather like making pickled eggs. You really need to have the perfect combination of ingredients. You also need to follow the recipe if you don't already have one that you know that works because you know it like the back of your hand. It needs to be a recipe that's been trusted, tried and true, so you can be confident in knowing, you'll have the perfect pickled eggs.

Having patience, taking the time to pay attention to detail is essential in order to get the kind of result you want, or perhaps even something better than you expected, and you'll be a better person for it.

The collapse of the Tower, representing the collapse of old forms, outgrown ideas, and attitudes that don't emerge from the whole self, but are "put on" like a costume to impress an audience, need to fall away, to make room for a better attitude that's no longer confined to that Labyrinth and you can say to yourself, bring on those pickled eggs! They're ready and so am I! If you want the recipe, just ask, I'll be happy to share it with you!

Seven of Cups - What's In Your Bank Account?

Psyche is praying to Aphrodite for mercy and for a miracle. She's appealing to the goddess of love to heal her relationship with Eros, to relieve and heal her from her overwhelming emotional burdens.

Often human beings when we find ourselves in desperate circumstances, we end up turning to the God/Goddess of our understanding to zealously plead our case. We can perhaps also expect to be physically healed from illness or relieved from another malady or circumstance.

Miracles come in all kinds of forms. I try to expect them, but much of the time my change in attitude can be just the kind of miracle I really need, though it might not necessarily be what I want, regardless of how unrealistic I am being. I need to understand, and accept what I can or can't change, and figure out the difference between the two.

 Acceptance for me is the key to everything in my life, no matter how difficult the circumstance. That's certainly not to say this is an easy task, not at all, because the things that happen are often very painful, and cause me to be fearful, caused by my lack of faith and trust. At this point I have replaced these with worry, anxiety and unrealistic expectations. It takes a lot of ongoing practice and work, one day at a time, sometimes one minute or second at time to gain faith and spiritual strength.

Realistically, my faith and spiritual strength is contingent on my maintenance of my daily conscious contact with the God of my understanding. I compare it to being rather like a bank account that I make regular deposits to, so I have a resource or emergency fund to rely on when the hard times come.

The Hermit - Solitude and Silence

The Hermit is the last of the moral lessons the Fool must learn. The lesson of time and the limitations of mortality, and to know and accept that human beings are all ultimately alone. It might sound cynical to say, but there is no 'happily ever after', and there is no one to rescue us to 'make it all better.'

Living in a very rural, coastal and rather isolated place lends itself to really getting in touch with my 'inner hermit'. If I didn't know and accept, deep within myself that this was true, I would've never decided to live here. The silence would be deafening, and the solitude would feel like a kind of confinement. and I'd have to leave.
 It's a conscious decision to self-impose solitude and silence, no matter where we are. If a person isn't comfortable in their own skin, such a psychological introspective location of the mind will never do.

The Hermit is a card I rarely draw, but I am reminded that for me today, it's arrived at just the right time. Regardless if one is alone or in a relationship, it's essential be comfortable, and to even want to spend time alone. It is during this alone time when and where we renew ourselves, and can be quiet enough to hear that quiet voice that has important things to say to us, gives insight, wisdom and discernment in making decisions. 

Taking the time to make solitude and silence a priority in our busy lives enriches our relationship with spirit, with others, and with the God of our own understanding.

Six of Cups - Is The Darkness Home?

The Six of Cups is a card of nostalgia and reflection. We see Psyche in deep contemplation, reflecting on her life and the past, in solitude.

Our North American culture seems to have a narrative of nostalgia, were everything old is new again, and we are often busy longing for the 'good ole days'. Not that there is anything inherently wrong with nostalgia, unless we  focus on what we think of as being the best of times, but conveniently have a tendency to forget or deny the negative aspects of days gone by. Often during the past we didn't truly appreciate our circumstance or situation, and we we're still wishing for some other day, instead of living in the present. We might say to ourselves, I was happy then or I'll be happy when...

It's human nature to avoid the negative or darker events in life, but this isn't reality, and it's often these difficult experiences that most shape who we are, and more often than not are real life lessons.

However we choose to respond, to whatever circumstance we find ourselves, it's up to us to either become bitter, cloaked in denial, or choose to grow as an empathetic, compassionate human being, that accepts life on life terms, instead of trying to escape reality in some way.

Once I came to accept the darkness, I learned how to save myself from myself and I began to really appreciate the light. My load became much lighter once I embraced the darkness, and then I was much happier.

Ten of Wands - What's The Next Big Thing?

Geez, it almost pains me to look at this card. It's not as negative or overwhelming as it appears, and isn't what it seems, but it is a situation for concern.

Jason has his Golden Fleece, and his great vessel, the Argo, is worse for wear after the long and intrepid voyage. Now his fellow Argonauts seem nowhere to be found. Perhaps they're burnt out, and gone back to their ordinary lives, having grown wearisome of Jason, and his next big adventure. Jason appears to be almost imprisoned, and overwhelmed by his own creative thought, surrounded by the ten blazing wands. The Golden Fleece appears to be discarded on the ground and all but forgotten.

At the beginning of the quest, Jason's expectations were extremely high. He was full of excitement, expectation. with a thrilling and contagious sense of great adventure. He'd been buoyed up by his mates, who believed in him, and that he'd be victorious. He was THE MAN!

The triumphant victory of obtaining the Golden Fleece and overcoming everything else along the way has left Jason feeling that it is all rather anti-climatic  He is no doubt thinking to himself, ok what now? What's the next big thing? It that all there is?
This kind of thinking is a self-inflicted pressure we can impose upon ourselves when we achieve our goals,  have found ourselves the center of attention, with people singing our praises. Being in this state of hyper-vigilance, and an adrenaline rush, is addictive. We find we are always looking for the next bigger and better thing.This state of hyper-vigilance can be very exhausting, for yourself, and for others.

There might be feeling of boredom, when in actual fact, you might find that boredom is the opportunity to simply live life on life's terms. Finding a deep contentment and serenity that extends it's hand to us, if we can accept it, is what I believe to be, one of the best secrets to happiness.

Seven of Swords - Not This Again?

Do you ever seem to keep drawing the same card repetitively, and wonder what the hell does this mean? You might feel like putting that card back, and taking another shot at drawing a more favourable card.

The Seven of Swords is that card for me today. Soon as I see it, I usually get this sinking feeling. Upon closer reflection, the reason a card continues to come up, is there is a lesson here, a message I need to pay attention  to. Whether it means caring for myself, having a positive attitude, or trying to keep my sense of humour, even when it might not feel comfortable or truthful, when I could just as easily say frig this, give up and break down into a big balling session because things are not working out the way I want them to.

None of us are perfect, and life is messy. It takes courage to face our own short comings, issues, problems, and imperfections. Especially if you feel like there's a dark cloud over your head, and you seem to be life's shit magnet.

Of course we all have a right to happiness, but we can never be happy all them time. An attitude adjustment is usually what's called for, and aligning an attitude of acceptance with the realization, we do whatever we have to do in life in order to get through the ups and downs.

Wearing rose coloured glasses might work temporarily, but that's not reality, it's denial. Lets face it, life ain't easy, but it doesn't have to be so hard if we can learn to have acceptance and develop the art of letting go.

If Orestes had accepted, let go, and took responsibility for his own happiness, his life's journey and path would have been easier.

Seven of Swords - Changing Our Minds

This isn't my favourite card here that I've drawn this morning. Regardless, I look always for the positive in each card, and take into account the realities of it's meaning, because there is a lesson to be learned, whether I like the card or not.

Most of our thoughts are generated in our mind based on our experience. First comes the thought, and then the action. Fortunately we can decide to change our thoughts and actions, before doing something we might regret.

Orestes has decided to commit a violent crime that is both hurtful to others, and to himself that will be life changing. Life will never be the same after his actions. Resentment, anger, and hurt have long filled his thoughts, and it looks like he is about to choose to act upon these, allowing himself to be over come, and consumed by feelings and not the discernment of his intution.

He has been spending years filling up his gunnysack with negative thoughts and resentments, which has gotten heavier and heavier, as he drags it around, and increasingly weighs him down. If he finally lets this burden get the best of him, it will result in dire consequences.

The lesson and the warning here is to not allow our behaviour to be dictated by what some else had done or not done or by what has happened in our lives. Resentment is a poison that can not be afforded. There are many other tools can be used to deal with the wrongs that have been done.

The fear we might feel surrounding our guilt about past actions, needs to be examined and addressed, so we aren't enslaved or held captive in negative ways into our future, otherwise we are liable to repeat past behaviours.

Acceptance is key, and forgiveness is powerful  and both are personally trans-formative skills, that will help us to change our thinking, and enable us to be open to transformation and to changing our minds.

Nine of Wands - Ready For Some New!

Over the past week,  I have consistently drawn all the Nines from each suit. Today I've drawn the Nine of Wands. It the Universe trying to tell me something I wonder? I am seeing the meaning as reflecting exactly where I am at present in mind, body and spirit, the three realms of experience.

I have come full circle, weathering the storms, ups and downs, through the labyrinth of life to point of a completion, attainment, and acceptance, like a spiral, but where there is closure, there is also beginning and renewal in that cycle of life..

I have met myself and made a connection, come to a place of acceptance. I have found I need to ask some important questions in regards to the number nine, in all it's elements.  Questions about how to live life to the fullest. What makes me feel whole? What particular undertaking will make me feel more complete as a person? How does change affect me, and how do I feel about moving into the next phase of my life? Am I feeling connected to myself, to others, and to the God of my understanding?

Interestingly, the Latin word for nine is novem and has the same root meaning novus, which means new.
I'm more than ready for some new!

Wheel of Fortune - Love-Go-Round

Yesterday I saw this quote by Marianne Williamson.

" Until seeing someone's darkness, you don't really know who they are. Until forgiving someone's darkness, you don't really know what love is." - Marianne Williamson

This description parallels the Wheel of Fortune, in that we never know what we are going to get, when it comes to life, or love. It is in acceptance where love lies. I am not referring to accepting injustice. But knowing what we can and cannot accept or change, and knowing the difference. Loving means acceptance of the good, bad and the ugly. Acceptance, and forgiveness with detachment does not exclude love, but includes and precisely defines love, in a way that is healthy for all concerned, and brings peace if we make an effort to change what we can. The only person we can truly change is ourselves.

The Emperor - Re-Parenting Yourself

To draw the Emperor, the Major Arcana card, is a sign of re-affirming strength for me today, in spite of feeling rather weak. Physical strength and power, are not always necessary or even wanted. I'd rather have inward strength of the a spiritual kind.

The Emperor ruled by Aries the Ram, provides a foundation from which to build upon, and though he can be as stubborn as a bull which can be his downfall, simultaneously, it can be his strength. When times get difficult it is this stubbornness that manifests in the form of the determination, perseverance and the endurance needed to overcome. He is a mentor, an example , and a strength to others who are struggling, and who need guidance. The Emperor can be counted on to help us, like an earthly father.

I have heard it said if you are finding it hard to have faith, then borrow someone else's. I've always loved this saying, and what it means to me is to lean on the strength of another, to help get you through whatever it is you are struggling with in life. This is what the Emperor archetype can do for us, as a symbol of inner strength, stability, guidance, and having a soft place to fall.

Many individuals grow up without the love and guidance of a father that is present, for one reason or another. This does not mean we cannot find others who can, and will provide guidance to us, especially in a spiritual sense.

I remember being told in a 12 Step program that I needed to learn to re-parent myself. I thought they were all crazy as bat crap, and I was mad as hell. I had this reaction because I had long felt I was always having to take care of others needs. I felt I'd always had to put my own needs on the back burner. Now, I was being told, no one was going to meet my needs but me. I didn't have a clue how to do this, and I felt very lost.

Growing up as a child I had unmet needs, and this is why I had such an adverse reaction to being told now I was responsible for meeting my own needs, and my own happiness.

Gradually, little by slowly, I learned what it meant to re-parent myself, and how to do this. There was nothing too easy about it, nor was I comfortable doing so, because deep down, I really didn't believe I deserved to get my needs met. I felt unworthy, and was lacking in self-worth. This is what happens to children who don't get there needs met. They grow up feeling unloved, unworthy, and undeserving of love. This mindset, full of negative inner messages of self-talk, often results in a cycle of abusive relationships and self-neglect, only to reinforce an already existing low self-esteem, and inability to care, and love oneself.

Six of Swords - Open Up - Letting Go - Acceptance

The Six of Swords portrays Orestes, who is determined in reaching his goal. He's impervious to the fact that the waters below are turbulent and rough, with storm clouds on the horizon, making for a difficult passage to his destination.

He stands strong and steadfast upright in his vessel. Of course we all know how dangerous is can be to stand in a boat. I've learned that lesson the last time, while in Newfoundland, as a young student art teacher. I had one foot on a wharf and one foot in the dory. What was I thinking.  Either my art supplies were going in, or I was. I didn't kiss the cod but definitely got a Newfoundland baptism of sorts, as I clung to the slimey wharf in my gumboots, waiting for someone to fetch me out, but the art supplies were dry!

Regardless of the danger Orestes defies the odds. He almost seems to tempt fate with his calm and serene composure. His eyes are fixed, his thought and focus is completely on the island before him, where he knows there are even more challenges that lie ahead, but he is resolute to meet them full on. He appears fearless and bold. Orestes has learned that acceptance of his past, present, and future is what gives real peace of mind and serenity.

The clarity of thought that comes when an individual makes up their mind to seize the day and set their sights on achieving the goal is quiet amazing, when you see the accomplishments made. In spite of the challenges and difficulties that can become obstacles, the determined individual overcomes these, with the right kind of attitude.

This attitude is one of being positive, having the right stuff to endure with resilience and flexibility.

It makes me think of what a wise man once said about embracing our difficulties, struggles and challenges instead of resisting ,and dragging them around. It is when we accept and let go with trust and faith, that our burdens are lessened, and our load is much lighter. We then find an inner strength, resolution, and determination, not in spite of, but because of these challenges, we overcome when we let go. Having a tranquil mind can give us insight and understanding, allowing us to move into the future.

“ You must open up like a flower to this divine force, loosen your hold on earth, its cares, its worries. “ - Look To This Day, Twenty-Four Hours a Day for Everyone

Wild Flowers - Catherine Meyers

Wheel of Fortune - Acceptance

There is definitely change ahead when I draw the Wheel of Fortune. What kind of change? I can only speculate, and that's not so clear. Only good fortune is hoped for at best. I would be wasting my time projecting into the future, and I am no fortune teller. Growth and a new phase is assured regardless of which way the wheel turns.

I think about the future a fair amount, and have hopes and dreams like any one. But the big thing is, is taking charge of what it is I want to actualize in my life. This can be the hard part. So I have been busily doing lots inventory, goal setting, and trying to crystallize what it is I want to do and accomplish. What I don't accomplish I have to accept responsibility for, good or bad.

I must say I am struggling to get past the Winter weather which is a really challenge psychologically and living alone I stay in my head. Thank goodness I have a writing outlet. Winter has always been something to overcome. I've never really liked it, and as I got older I disliked it even more. I don't remember even liking Winter as a kid. I do remember before I started school, being left outside for long periods of time at the baby sitters, along with another kid. The woman who was minding us had a daughter the same age as her cousin and me. We were both left outside in the cold while her mother allowed her daughter to come back in the house. I never told my mother. Perhaps this might have something to do with the reason I don't like Winter, and have a unpleasant residual memory. I certainly relate Winter with being cold and dark which I believe directly affects my mood along with having a touch of Seasonal Affective Disorder.

So goes the Wheel of Fortune, life is not perfect, full of big and small messes, but it is a beautiful life. Some days are diamonds, some days are stones and we can't have one without the other. Acceptance is the key to all my difficulties.

What To Do With Nostalgia - Six of Cups

Sitting on a rock, where she first met Eros, and surrounded by the calm sea, Psyche holds the golden cup, which she pensively stares into. In her other hand, she holds her wilting bridle bouquet. She has been abandoned by her husband Eros, and left with nothing, but nostalgic memories. However, not all things are as they appear to be, and this is not an unhappy card.

To be able to learn something about yourself through loss, can be a very positive experience. It can bring peace of mind, a sense of harmony, and contentment. A new found strength through our loss brings serenity, and after the storm comes the calm.

If we can take a realistic inventory of our past, this can transform our future through what we have lost, and gained from our experience. Learning from these lessons is essential, otherwise we may be repeat the same mistakes, which will lead to a state of confusion and chaos.

Living in and longing nostalgically for the past, is a useless exercise. Acceptance and gratitude are always the key to having a happy life in the present.

Death - How Death Can Save Your Life

I drew the Death card this morning, and I was glad, because in spite of it's dark foreboding appearance, and looking like Darth Vader, it is an affirming card, that reminds me to be willing to accept change as being a huge part of life, a card representing acceptance of change, transition or transformation, so that rebirth can occur. The little folk beneath, seem welcoming, one even offers a flower, and they are not running away.

Change is not a walk in the park, as there are always varying degrees of trepidation, and some real anxiety when things happen, as we can feel everything is out of control. With acceptance, making the decision to let go, realizing I am not in control, along with the choices I make, this is what can alter my life for the better.

My whole attitude, and outlook changed twenty years ago, after I chose to live a sober life, and I have been in transition ever since. Letting go of the old self, is a kind of death, because of this willingness to change, letting go of the old life, and embracing my new life, that was what saved me from a dead end road. You don't have to be physically dead, to not be fully alive.

There is much to be learned through this card, and through actual physical death, which contemporary society keeps at arms length. Death has much to teach us about life and it can even save our lives.

Five of Swords - Acceptance

I have hairy toes! I've never admitted this publically, but I've come to accept it, and no, I am not a hobbit. But even if I was a hobbit, I'd have to accept this too.

We all have to accept our limitations of what we can and cannot do. This is what the Five of Swords represents.
It can be difficult to understand or empathize with another person's struggle in life, unless we have had a similar experience, or unless we have walked their path, or seen the world through their eyes.

 Many of us experience rejection for one reason or another. It may be for the way we look, how much money we make, our race or religion, who we are related to, or what side of the tracks we grew up on.
The worst form of rejection I would say, is not being able to accept ourselves, the positive and the negative aspects of our personality and circumstance.

I have come to believe that acceptance is the key happiness. It enables us to understand, and to come to terms with people, places and things. When we can accept, and love ourselves, we become real like the Velveteen Rabbit.


 “Real isn't how you are made,' said the Skin Horse. 'It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.'

'Does it hurt?' asked the Rabbit.

'Sometimes,' said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. 'When you are Real you don't mind being hurt.'

'Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,' he asked, 'or bit by bit?'

'It doesn't happen all at once,' said the Skin Horse. 'You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand.”
― Margery Williams, The Velveteen Rabbit