Monday, March 21, 2016

Five of Wands - I'm Not Wonder Woman?

Here we see Jason taking on the dragon who protects the Golden Fleece. Medea his lover and helper is close by his side to help him, with her three flaming wands. In life we all have our own personal dragons to slay. I call them shit sandwiches. Not one likes them, we hate them, unless you're addicted to a constant state of hyper-vigilance, which many people are, having grown up in chaotic and dysfunctional families, never knowing what's going to happen next.

Often the concealed lesson that lies within these dragons and sandwiches, is a revelation of exactly what we are made of when we find out our depth of character. But there's nothing easy about it.

The outcome isn't always positive, if we realize that we might be emotionally and/or morally bankrupt, collapsing under all the pressure, and we are paralyzed with a regressive inertia or fear of failure. We might even want or act on feelings of revenge or blame ourselves for having a meltdown that leaves us feeling like a very weak person.

This state I describe as being sick and tired of being sick and tired. I have to let go and turn it over to the universe of the God of my understanding, and ask for help. Sometimes we simply need to get a backbone and be our own heroine or hero and fight. It's a remarkable thing what having a little faith can do, one step at a time. I don't have to solve everything immediately, and I don't have to do it alone. I do have to decide to make some kind of compromise.

When I think I can solve these kinds of battles and struggles on my own, this is when it gets me into real trouble. I'll cut my nose off to spite my face, deluding myself into thinking I'm Wonder Woman! I accepted a while ago that I'm not Wonder Women, but I still have to remind myself of this fact now and again.

This doesn't do anything to change the fact that we'll still have dragons to slay, and shit sandwiches to eat, but if so, find someone to help you slaughter that savage beast, and get yourself an olive. It just might help the sandwich go down a little easier.


Ellen said...

Accepting we are not wonder woman is the first step of feeling better about ourselves. Asking for help in prayer is not easy but it gives such a huge amount of relief to know and feel we are not alone in our struggle

Unknown said...

Yes Ellen it's such an unburdening when you realize you don't have to do it all, fix everyone and be responsible for other people's happiness. You sure do feel better about yourself once you know it's perfectly ok and human to be weak. That's where our real strength begins I think and we have a shoulder to lean on and a soft place to land.