Wednesday, December 30, 2015

Page of Swords - Are The Storms of Life Washing You Away?

The Page of Wands is blowing up a storm. This card urges us to have courage, and honesty, appealing to our higher self, in the midst of turmoil, serious trouble, or what might even seem to be the end of all things we know and love. Much like the refugees fleeing for their lives from their war torn countries.

I used to have apocalyptic dreams a few years ago about Tsunamis. I don't know why I had these dreams and can only conjecture about their meaning.

Being an optimist by nature, who can be prone to an underlining depression, which I attribute to the affects of alcoholism within my immediate family. Sometimes it's just life that can get me down, trying to make sense of why bad things happen to good people all over the world.

Lately I've been really noticing and thinking about all of the catastrophic weather that has devastated many parts of the world. Everything from recent tornadoes in Texas, to floods in the British Isles, in the States right now, and yesterday there was a mild but nonetheless, ever threatening earthquake in the west coast of Canada, where there is a fault line that exists, running all the way up from the California coast.

Last night I found myself watching you-tube and a documentary about the massive tornado that happened in Joplin, Missouri  in 2011, which was a catastrophic EF5 multiple-vortex tornado that struck late in the afternoon of Sunday, May 22, 2011. This event in the US was the biggest tornado in history since 1947.

What I was very touched by, was how the residents of Joplin immediately helped one another, how ever they could, in the immediate aftermath of this catastrophe.

Today I was also reminded of the resilience within the human spirit, when I heard again, the re-broadcast of the interview with Wendel Price  who talked about the response to Hurricane Katerina in New Orleans, which was so inspiring, in knowing that, when we feel and think all hope is lost, it's not.

We all have storms in life, whether it be of a personal nature or that of the physical kind. How we respond to these after affects can either leave us broken and defeated, or strengthened and victorious. We can help others and get our focus on recovery, by being proactive, positive, and above all, inspiring hope.

The trials and storms of life can help us to respond in a way that honours the Spirit, or a Power greater than ourselves.


Saturday, December 26, 2015

Two of Wands - Are You A Conscious Choice Maker?

Here we see Chiron the healer and teacher in the cave, well hidden from view. Jason stands with two burning wands held on either side. Jason has left his more base behaviours behind thanks to Chiron, and come out into the light on his own to face the world, to decide what direction he will take.

Behaviour that is part of our the human nature we all possess, often referred to as being our monkey mind, that behaves according to a fight or flight reaction, is instinctual, and somewhat opposed to the intellectual or intuitive and moral direction. But we all have choices to make in spite of our basic instincts.

We all can find ourselves in situations where humans are behaving badly, my mother use to call it "cuttin' up your didoes," it is displaying some kind of foolish and destructive antics in other words. This saying is of unknown origin, but related to the Greek legend of Dido, who committed suicide after she'd been abandoned by her husband. Bad behaviour stems from deep hurt of some kind. The bad behaviour can become so convoluted, that most of us have a difficult time feeling much compassion or understanding for another with whom we just want to get the heck away from, or we want retaliate with similar reactive behaviour.

Christmas seems to bring out the worst or the best in folks, being a time when emotions are often close to the surface. Many are of us are stressed, overtired, overwhelmed, and over spent. We can be depressed by unrealistic expectations never fulfilled, and wound up tight as a drum. Someone is sure to get their underwear in a knot, and then next thing you know, there's a big blow up.

Many adults I know that grew up in alcoholic homes, can recall how the Christmas tree often got fired out the door, and onto the street. Fortunately this is not one of my unpleasant memories.

We have a choice how we respond to someone else's bad behaviour when they are cuttin' up their didoes! We can react in kind to their inappropriate actions, which only escalates matters, or we can extend a hand of understanding and kindness.


This was my experience Christmas Day with another behaving badly. I offered understanding, and a big hug. I was then was shown tears and appreciation for doing so. It was an important lesson, for me mostly, on "becoming a conscious choice-maker."

"By becoming a conscious choice-maker, you begin to generate actions that are evolutionary for you and for those that are around you. And that’s all you need to do." ~ Deepak Chopra

Wednesday, December 23, 2015

Six of Pentacles - What's Love Got To Do With It?

Giving at Christmas is the spirit that seems to preoccupy most of us this time of year. Many have no material possessions to give, others have more than enough, and some are more interested in getting if, they are buying into the commercialism and consumerism of it all and have completely lost the message.

The Six of Pentacles is about generosity and really about love.

  “When people love each other, they are content with very little. When we have light and joy in our hearts, we don't need material wealth. The most loving communities are often the poorest. If our own life is luxurious and wasteful, we can't approach poor people. If we love people, we want to identify with them and share with them.”
― Jean Vanier,
Community And Growth

I have been very blessed and loved by many this past year, and I am so very grateful.
When people experience difficulty and extreme hardship. they we can find strength in their weakness, and become resilient, and find hope.

My prayer is to find spirit of love at Christmas or whatever holiday it is that we celebrate, that will last all through the year, every year.

Monday, December 21, 2015

Knight of Swords - Can You Have One Without The Other?

I relate very much to the Knight of Swords as it relates to Gemini, my Sun sign. According to Roman Mythology these inseparable brothers were considered the patrons of horses, a majestic creature I greatly  love and adore.  

Castor the mortal, and Polydeuces the Divine represent courage, adventure and change. Having a sense of adventure and being open to change can make us better people. When we can temper our intuition/emotion with our rational/intellectual mind and visa versa, this can help us to be aware of our behaviour and our mortal/divine nature.

This card brings to mind the Winter Solstice, with the presence of both light and dark in our lives.
Like the twin brothers it is a good reminder to me that I can't have one without the other, and I've learned to appreciate both individually, and simultaneously.
I hope you are looking forward to the future with adventure and change and I pray that you have courage.

Sunday, December 20, 2015

The Hanged Man - Is Patience A Virtue?

"Patience is a virtue", is what I heard, from my grade nine geography teacher. She said it very quietly,  under her breath, but loudly enough for me to hear her. I wonder if she was saying this for her benefit or mine. It was probably for both, now that I think about it.

She was a good woman, kind, but rather at a loss as to how to manage a group of pubescent, out of control, angst ridden teenagers. I felt sorry for her. I never gave her any grief, and I think she appreciated that, but I always remembered what she said about patience.

Little did I know how true this is, and how very relevant and important it would be in my own life, as I'm certain it was in hers.

People are always waiting. We wait in lines, wait on hold, for phone calls, for kids, for parents and for patience itself.
It's something I had to practice very intently, because I was impatient. I wanted everything to happen yesterday. Particularly in relation to my recovery as an alcoholic. This was my biggest trial. I was waiting for  especially waiting for happiness, which seemed to be elusive to me.

I've learned to rest in situations, when I could potentially be very impatient. It still can be difficult for me, especially when I get frustrated. Being patient, just because, allows me to find out who I am.

The Hanged Man is about waiting and resting. Taking a step back. Chillaxing when you are mostly feeling that you live in a world that wants you to hurry up and wait. The world can also feel like it is moving to slow. Simultaneously it moves too fast, and time is passing in the blink of an eye. You can't slow down and you are never moving fast enough. This is the dichotomy of the world and of life.

The Hanged Man urges us to be patient, to rest, to take a time out to renew, restore ourselves before we move ahead, and so we can respond with clarity and discernment.

Christmas is a good time to rest, to take stock and enjoy yourself, take pleasure were you can, in spite of feeling like your life is hanging upside down.

Saturday, December 19, 2015

Page of Swords - Not Thinkin' Right?

Sometimes we can think too much, especially if we have a lot of time on our hands, and are tending to live in our heads. We just ain't think' right. Going for a long walk, doing something physical, or creative, can clear our muddled thoughts, and get those the cob webs clean out of our mind.

This Mythic Page of Swords is embodied in the mythic figure of Zephyrus. Caught up in a west whirlwind, blowin' the bejesus clouds out of his way, and making clouds of his own. The West Wind is actually coming from his own mouth, which can mean, he has a propensity for gossip or might be the victim of gossip. This indicates his immaturity and unbridled nature. He stirs up the elements, though he calms down later on once he meets the love of his life. In the mean time, he has some good ideas and lots of energy which needs to be positively nurtured and channeled, otherwise he can be his own worst enemy.

I can relate to this card today. I've been spending too much time in my head lately, so I started a creative project to help channel my energy, and give my brain a kind of meditative time out. I've been making baskets again which is a very nurturing activity.

Thursday, December 17, 2015

Ten of Wands - What's The Next Big Thing?

Geez, it almost pains me to look at this card. It's not as negative or overwhelming as it appears, and isn't what it seems, but it is a situation for concern.

Jason has his Golden Fleece, and his great vessel, the Argo, is worse for wear after the long and intrepid voyage. Now his fellow Argonauts seem nowhere to be found. Perhaps they're burnt out, and gone back to their ordinary lives, having grown wearisome of Jason, and his next big adventure. Jason appears to be almost imprisoned, and overwhelmed by his own creative thought, surrounded by the ten blazing wands. The Golden Fleece appears to be discarded on the ground and all but forgotten.

At the beginning of the quest, Jason's expectations were extremely high. He was full of excitement, expectation. with a thrilling and contagious sense of great adventure. He'd been buoyed up by his mates, who believed in him, and that he'd be victorious. He was THE MAN!

The triumphant victory of obtaining the Golden Fleece and overcoming everything else along the way has left Jason feeling that it is all rather anti-climatic  He is no doubt thinking to himself, ok what now? What's the next big thing? It that all there is?
This kind of thinking is a self-inflicted pressure we can impose upon ourselves when we achieve our goals,  have found ourselves the center of attention, with people singing our praises. Being in this state of hyper-vigilance, and an adrenaline rush, is addictive. We find we are always looking for the next bigger and better thing.This state of hyper-vigilance can be very exhausting, for yourself, and for others.

There might be feeling of boredom, when in actual fact, you might find that boredom is the opportunity to simply live life on life's terms. Finding a deep contentment and serenity that extends it's hand to us, if we can accept it, is what I believe to be, one of the best secrets to happiness.

Wednesday, December 16, 2015

Five of Cups - Are You Alone?

There she goes, running desperately behind Eros, after having shone the light of the lamp upon on him while he lay sleeping. Eros awoke and fled once his identity was revealed. It had been forbidden to do this, as there was an unspoken agreement to simply remain in love with an image of love.

Psyche has now lost her love, is left alone after this betrayal, causing her great regret and remorse. However all is not lost and there still is something that remains. This can be creatively worked on, being a challenge and commitment to the future.

Many of us like Psyche desperately pursue what it is we think we want and the more we pursue the more elusive it becomes and the farther away it escapes our grasp. We are left alone, and left to our own devices.

Yesterday I drew the card Nine of Pentacles, examining the call of the soul, or returning to ourselves, and resting in a intended solitude. The Five of Cups goes deeper into what it really means to be alone, how our emotion and intuition comes into play.

Originally the meaning of alone, consisted of two words, all one, which meant to be wholly one,  related to intentional solitude. In ancient days solitude or the all one state once was palliative, preventative, and a way of listening to the inner self, and used as an oracle, a way to call up the soul, take a personal inventory and assessment our lives. It is the way we draw our soul strength.

 In other words having a sense of unity and wholeness within ourselves, that truly understands, we are never truly alone. We have an innate need as human beings to feel a communion with the goodness of the universe. We live in the world, but are not of this world, and are simply pilgrims passing through.

 We need to wear the world as a loose garment. Our sense of self, emotional stability, and happiness is not dependent on something, someone, or some place outside of ourselves. If we deem people, places and things to dictate or control our happiness we will find ourselves unhappy..

Psyche represents the soul. It is what the word means, soul. The soul implicitly points to how vital it is to understand how we are souls clothed in physical bodies. We are human beings of course, but first and foremost we a spiritual beings deeply connected to a power greater than ourselves. 

Monday, December 14, 2015

Nine of Pentacles - Is It All About The Stuff?

In December especially, I really notice there's always too much month at the end of the money. The Nine of Pentacles is a nice sight and encourages me to remain hopeful in knowing I'll be alright, and to take great pleasure in what is really important to me in life, my relationship with myself, with others, and with the God of my understanding. This card is about being pleased with what you have been able to achieve, and not in an ego inflated way.

Christmas can be, and is such a stressful time for so many. I opted out a long time ago with all the preoccupation with consuming, preparing, and the exhaustion that goes along with the "Season". I was never  interested it this aspect, because I was blessed with having a mother who showed me the real meaning of Christmas and spirituality.

I do my reading at night in the warmth, comfort and cosyness of my bed. And since I've managed to do such a good job on cleaning and organizing my bedroom and my house, it's makes my bedtime routine even more enjoyable. It's my happy place and one of the things I love to do for myself.

Yesterday at bedtime, I picked up my copy of Women Who Run With The Wolves, by Clarissa Pinkola Estes, that is always on my bedside table. I don't read every night, but really I felt the need to last night. I was curious to know where I'd left off in my reading of this most favourite of books. I noticed I'd bookmarked the story of Seal Skin, Soul Skin, one of my very favourites, and I'd done an egg tempera painting of this special story, which I think was also my favourite painting in the series of sixteen I'd painted.

Reading about the meaning of this story struck me, because the theme or message of Seal Skin Soul Skin is about women coming or going home, and returning to ourselves. Whether it be by way of retreating to some special quiet place, rekindling an old forgotten interest, going for a long walk in the woods or by the sea, whatever it is we choose; simply put, it is about women doing the thing, that brings them in touch with themselves. It is about taking time for themselves, regardless of what anyone else thinks or how they react. Women know what they need, and want, and they know when they need to do it. If we pay attention and act on returning to ourselves, by listening to the call of our souls, and resting there, this brings deep nourishing soul contentment, happiness and health.

 I thought this was a really appropriate story and message to read considering the time of year, and how women get so preoccupied with making Christmas perfect for everyone else, and often end up exhausted, burnt out, as this kind of doing for others is expected and often unappreciated. It leaves us unsatisfied, frustrated and sad. This is not what Christmas is about.

My Christmas wish for you, is that you listen to the call of your soul and that you rest there.

Seal Skin Soul Skin

In the harsh lands to the North lived an old man who trapped, fished, and slept well but he was lonely.
Sometimes when he was in his kayak out fishing in the shallows a seal would come near which reminded him of the old stories about how seals were once human. Occasionally when he looked in their wise, wild, and loving eyes, he would feel such a pang of loneliness that tears coursed down the well worn crevices in his face.

One night he fished past dark but was unable to catch anything so he headed toward home. The moon was rising when he spotted a group of naked women dancing on a large rock. Because he was lonely man, he stayed and watched. He drifted closer and closer. He was so dazzled by their beauty he didn’t notice when his kayak bumped into the rock. He spotted something lying near his kayak; it was sealskin. Perhaps due to his loneliness he stole it and hid it in his parka. Soon the women began putting on their sealskin’s, except for one. She searched high and low for it but could not find it. The man stepped from behind the rock and appealed to her to become his wife. The woman denied his request because she was not from his world. 

However, he insisted stating that he would return her sealskin to her in seven summers. She could then decide to remain or go. She reluctantly said yes. 

In time, they had a son. The mother shared stories of the creatures of her world with her son: walrus, seal, whale, and salmon. As time passed, her flesh began to dry out. At first it flaked, then cracked, the skin on her eyelids began to peel. Next, her hair began to fall out and she developed a limp. As each day passed, her eyes became more and more dull until she could barely see at all. 

Eight winters passed when seal woman confronted the old man, their argument awakened their son. Seal Woman wanted what she was made of returned to her, she wanted her sealskin. She had fulfilled her promise.The old man refused stating she would abandon them both. He then left the hut in anger. Their son was filled with sorrow over their arguing and cried himself back to sleep. 

Later that night the voice of the wind awakened the boy, calling out to him. He followed the sound to a cliff where he saw a large, old seal on a rock near shore. The grandfather seal was calling the boy. The boy scrambled down the cliff; at the base, he tripped over a bundle. As he unrolled it he held it to his nose, it smelled of his mother. He found her sealskin. As he hugged her sealskin, the love of his mother filled him with pain and joy as her soul passed through his. 

The boy climbed the cliff back to his house where he gave it to her and she quickly pulled it on. She scooped him up and ran to the sea. She swam with her son, who could breathe underwater, down to the underwater coves of the seals. 

Seven days and seven nights passed, during which in time, the luster came back to Seal Woman’s hair and eyes. Her body was soon restored and she no longer had a limp. At the end of the seventh day she had to return her son to the topside world where he belonged. She instructed him to touch those things she touched when he felt lonely and missed her. He would feel her presence and her love.
This story is about a sealwoman who has her sealskin stolen from her by a lonely fisherman. He promises to return it after 7 years as long as she lives with him for this time. The woman agrees and returns to his home. The sealwoman has a child and although content enough, she feels increasingly uncomfortable in the outer world. Her hair starts falling out, her eyelids start peeling and her skin cracks.

One night the child wakes up to hear arguing. It has been 7 years and the sealwoman is demanding that she have her sealskin back. "I want what I am made of returned to me" cries the sealwoman. The husband refuses to give his wife back the sealskin for fear that she will lose him. The child goes to sleep but wakes up in the night to hear the sound of the wind and goes out into the dark. He comes upon his mothers' sealskin and returns it to her. The sealwoman pulls on her sealskin, grabs her child and heads for the ocean. She breathes into the child's mouth 3 times and then dives deep into the waters. Together they swim until they are home with her family. - See more at:
This story is about a sealwoman who has her sealskin stolen from her by a lonely fisherman. He promises to return it after 7 years as long as she lives with him for this time. The woman agrees and returns to his home. The sealwoman has a child and although content enough, she feels increasingly uncomfortable in the outer world. Her hair starts falling out, her eyelids start peeling and her skin cracks.

One night the child wakes up to hear arguing. It has been 7 years and the sealwoman is demanding that she have her sealskin back. "I want what I am made of returned to me" cries the sealwoman. The husband refuses to give his wife back the sealskin for fear that she will lose him. The child goes to sleep but wakes up in the night to hear the sound of the wind and goes out into the dark. He comes upon his mothers' sealskin and returns it to her. The sealwoman pulls on her sealskin, grabs her child and heads for the ocean. She breathes into the child's mouth 3 times and then dives deep into the waters. Together they swim until they are home with her family. - See more at:

This story is about a sealwoman who has her sealskin stolen from her by a lonely fisherman. He promises to return it after 7 years as long as she lives with him for this time. The woman agrees and returns to his home. The sealwoman has a child and although content enough, she feels increasingly uncomfortable in the outer world. Her hair starts falling out, her eyelids start peeling and her skin cracks.

One night the child wakes up to hear arguing. It has been 7 years and the sealwoman is demanding that she have her sealskin back. "I want what I am made of returned to me" cries the sealwoman. The husband refuses to give his wife back the sealskin for fear that she will lose him. The child goes to sleep but wakes up in the night to hear the sound of the wind and goes out into the dark. He comes upon his mothers' sealskin and returns it to her. The sealwoman pulls on her sealskin, grabs her child and heads for the ocean. She breathes into the child's mouth 3 times and then dives deep into the waters. Together they swim until they are home with her family. - See more at:

Seal Skin Soul Skin - Egg Tempera on board - Catherine Meyers 2012

Saturday, December 12, 2015

Seven of Swords - Not This Again?

Do you ever seem to keep drawing the same card repetitively, and wonder what the hell does this mean? You might feel like putting that card back, and taking another shot at drawing a more favourable card.

The Seven of Swords is that card for me today. Soon as I see it, I usually get this sinking feeling. Upon closer reflection, the reason a card continues to come up, is there is a lesson here, a message I need to pay attention  to. Whether it means caring for myself, having a positive attitude, or trying to keep my sense of humour, even when it might not feel comfortable or truthful, when I could just as easily say frig this, give up and break down into a big balling session because things are not working out the way I want them to.

None of us are perfect, and life is messy. It takes courage to face our own short comings, issues, problems, and imperfections. Especially if you feel like there's a dark cloud over your head, and you seem to be life's shit magnet.

Of course we all have a right to happiness, but we can never be happy all them time. An attitude adjustment is usually what's called for, and aligning an attitude of acceptance with the realization, we do whatever we have to do in life in order to get through the ups and downs.

Wearing rose coloured glasses might work temporarily, but that's not reality, it's denial. Lets face it, life ain't easy, but it doesn't have to be so hard if we can learn to have acceptance and develop the art of letting go.

If Orestes had accepted, let go, and took responsibility for his own happiness, his life's journey and path would have been easier.

Wednesday, December 9, 2015

The Sun - Is The Sun Indifferent?

I can't remember when I last drew The Sun for my daily draw. It's uplifting, hopeful, positive, and a very promising card, on this gray overcast day here in Nova Scotia.

Recently I've been feeling inundated with the media hype about Donald Trump. I'm really so sick of seeing his foolish face, and all of his negative racist pronouncements.

This morning I heard some one say, good people need to speak out against this racism and injustice. I agree. I took this point to heart, though many of us might be think if we ignore Trump, he'll just go away. I'm tempted to think the same myself. Then I remembered, and reflected on what Eli Weiss said about indifference.

"The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference. The opposite of beauty is not ugliness, it's indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it's indifference. And the opposite of life is not death, but indifference between life and death."         
                                               - Eli Weiss

The Sun is the antithesis of indifference. It's the life force, the power of consciousness to dispel darkness with affirming purpose, foresight, and a faith in the striving of the human spirit.

Monday, December 7, 2015

Ace of Cups - How Full Is Your Cup?

Today was the perfect day to draw this Ace of Cups. With Christmas coming on I'm feeling good about a lot of things and enjoying having gotten my Christmas decorating done, with my little Charlie Brown tree.

My Charlie Brown Christmas Tree

I've continued on my cleaning and reorganizing in my house. I've come to realize that taking care of your home is taking care of yourself. Actually I think I've become addicted to how all this is making me feel, in spite of my back being sore. I'll take it easy tomorrow.

Things are really financially difficult for me right now, but truthfully my worry really is almost none existent, which is a little unusual for me, and I'm feeling I have all I need. In many ways my cup is full and over flowing with blessings. The Ace of Cups on a divinatory level heralds this outpouring of feeling, which can be overwhelming. It isn't all happy feelings, but many different emotions that rise to the surface at this time of year, when thoughts are full of Christmas reflections.

On Sunday I went to a meeting with a large group of local residents to discuss the progress of having a refugee family come to our village. In three weeks our community has raised a total of 9,000 dollars in just three weeks. Two people have very generously donated two houses for the refugee families, in case we get more than one family. Amazing!

Aphrodite being the goddess of love, I am deeply reminded what life is all about, giving to others, and I am feeling very grateful, happy and content. Perhaps I've caught the Hanukkah pre-Christmas Spirit.

Happy Hanukkah everyone.

Tuesday, December 1, 2015

The Hermit - Who's In Charge of Your Attitude?

Generally my attitude toward life is to know I am blessed, especially because I see how much I have to be grateful for. Don't get me wrong, there are days when I can feel like, well what my late husband use to describe feeling like re-fried shit, and needless to say, on those days my positive attitude can be lacking, if not non-existent.You get the picture.

There are also many days when I feel really blessed, especially when I know the universe and the God of my understanding provides a day of synchronicity and where I get the clear message that whispers to me, "you are blessed." I love those days!

This is the kind of day I had today.  My day started with learning about Charles Swindoll. Actually with Marie Forleo, who told me about Charles Swindoll.  He said this. 

"Life is 10 percent what happens to me and 90 percent how I react to it."

" The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude to me is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than success, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, gift, or skill. It will make or break a company...a church...a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past...we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10 percent what happens to me and 90 percent how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our attitudes. 

Charles Swindoll 

Next thing that happened was I got to do my laundry. I know I must sound like I've gone completely doolally, but no I haven't. Why doing my laundry made me feel so blessed was because for many months I have had some serious plumbing issues, and I haven't been able to get fixed for one reason or another. My sweet neighbour friend Tex that I'd blogged about, who had been on the program Canada's Worst Handyman,  and who had magnificently fixed my plumbing problem. 

I have had a washing machine for some time now, that was very generously given to me. But because of my plumbing issues, I haven't been able to do any laundry, unless at someone else's house. 

Today my friend Tex once again arrived to install more pipes, and to hook up my washing machine! I was never so happy and excited to do laundry in my life! I wasn't able to pay him, but he was thrilled to be given one of my horse portrait oil paintings, an old bike I no longer used, that he was going to give his wife, and a brand new sweet kitty for his little daughter. It made me feel so good, twice blessed really.

So what does this have to do with Tarot? Drawing The Hermit this evening was a confirmation, and an affirmation. The lamp that Cronos, the ancient god, whose name means time, carries the lamp of insight and understanding, gleaned from being alone and having a willingness to patiently wait. With this, comes a wisdom, a developed mind and heart, a firm sense of identity, and a deep respect for one's own limitations. And for the blessing of being in charge of my attitude today, I'm very grateful.

Tuesday, November 24, 2015

Seven of Swords - Do I Take My Own Advice?

 The Seven of Swords can be seen by some as a dark card. I see it as being about applying the skills of diplomacy, tact, charm or even gile as a means to an end, to achieve the outcome we want or need. But what really interests me is in knowing how I apply these skills to myself?

 Sometimes we can be good a convincing others, or giving our expertise advice to someone else, but when it comes to ourselves, we're often not so motivated, even though we might very much want or need a desired outcome.

 Having a a big ongoing brouhaha with ourselves gets to be real tiresome, very frustrating, and we can easily just give up. Letting go, and turning it over can certainly help matters and for me prayer helps immeasurably, and even if I didn't, I'd have nothing to loose. Being a little stubborn helps too.

  If it's something you absolutely have to do, and there are existing outside mitigating circumstances that cause you to get your arse in gear, these can certainly get you moving, because if you don't, there will likely be a price to be paid. If the price paid is going to be worse than doing what you aren't motivated to do, in all likely hood we'll do it, because we don't want to loose face, be embarrassed, ashamed or simply disappointed in ourselves for nothing trying. Most times the price is too hard on the old ego.

We can't always find the ideal approach in order to get the job done, but whatever approach we take, and it does get the job done, you might find that you feel a whole lot better for this, and wonder why you didn't or couldn't seem to heed your own advice.

I've been busy over this past month getting some major, what I'd describe as big yucky jobs around the house done. As a matter of fact, I just finished one that had me contorted in just about every imaginable position. But as we say here in the Maritimes, I got 'er done! Wow, I'm sure glad that one's over. I'm getting better at taking my own advice!

Sunday, November 22, 2015

Eight of Cups - Are You Exercising Your Kindness & Generousity Muscle?

Not unlike Persephone seen here in the Eight of Cups, we all at some point, descend into the underworld of the unconscious, it is a spiritual experience that changes us, in an emotional, and/or spiritual way. In life when there is a circumstance, such as the dark night of the soul, or situations that might appear hopeless and hapless, it is difficult to think that we will ever see the light of day, because everything is out of our control, and there appears to be no way out. There is a way out.

After we emerge from this darkness, into the light we are transformed, into a new person that has gained a deeper empathy, allowing us to be kinder, and more generous people.

Research has concluded that kindness and generousity are the two determining factors that strengthen the bonds between human relationships. It may sound to us that this makes very reasonable sense, and we should certainly be able to behave accordingly, to turn toward one another in respect, instead of turning away. Much of the time reality does not bare this out, when you see how many relationships end in feelings of contempt, and even hatred, in particular when we see the state of the world full of war and violence.

That said, kindness is a like a muscle and the more we use it, the stronger it becomes and it affects those around us in a positive manner. Just as hate breeds more hate, kindness in turn breeds more kindness and generousity. So let's be kind and generous to one another.

"Be kind; everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.". 
                                     Ian Maclaren

Friday, November 20, 2015

Page of Swords - Who's Really The Worst Handyman?

This morning at 9 o'clock my neighbour offered to help me with an ongoing plumbing problem I've had. This problem was created from the mess a paid contractor had made some time ago. When this contractor did most of the work, which I thought had been completed properly, it wasn't long it'd become a big nightmare, after paying this so called professional worker, he'd left the job half done, and me with a real big headache. In my estimation he was anything but professional, not even a good handyman. He'd promised to return to finish remaining work I needed completed, but as soon as he got his money, he was never to be seen again.

The Page of Swords that I just drew shows me that this is my young neighbour, who is a character, and some one with such a good heart, in the right place, with lots of energy. There's lots I could say about him, but I'll tell you this. He's a kind of celebrity of sorts round these parts, and every one knows him. Most of all he's got guts, brains, a great sense of humour, a big heart, with a personality to match. You can't help but love him.. He's one of those unique individuals who's always full of surprises and the salt of the earth. What you see, is what you get. Like the Page of Swords, that relays the message, to be like Tex, your authentic self.

A few years back his name had been submitted to the reality TV show, on the Discovery channel called Canada's Worst Handyman. At the end of the series, he'd come in second. And now I know why. He fixed my serious plumbing problem, and in my eyes today he is not only Canada's best handyman, not the worst. He's actually hero to me.

Thank you Tex. You've made my life a whole lot easier and happier, and I can hardly wait to hop into the tub, and every time I turn on my water taps, I'll think of you!

Tex & his wife Tara

Thursday, November 19, 2015

Strength - What Makes You Strong?

Many moons ago, I used to do a lot of strength training for many years. I felt great to feel the physical strength that comes with resistance training. It's something I could definitely benefit from again, now that I've reached that crone age. I have to go for a bone density test next month, so it will be interesting to see the results of that test.

The kind of strength that comes with strength training can indirectly affect you inner strength of course, but the strength that results from trust, persistence, perseverance, and experience is equally effective to increase your strength of character.

Living on my own for most of my life has mostly proven to be a challenge in many ways, and though I am an independent woman, I would never think, nor could I ever say, that I did it all on my own, because I have that kind of strength. No, definitely not, far from it.

There is a kind of strength in numbers for sure. If we help one another, and really understand that sometimes we all need to ask for help, and that it's equally as important to simply offer your help to others, without them having to ask, and help one another to be strong in our weakness.

Lately I've been getting some very unexpected help, and today was such a day, and I want to say how very grateful I am. Truthfully, I know I have my own strengths, but honestly my strength relies on the help that comes from the grace and mercy of the God of my understanding, and from the generous heart and spirit of others. Without them all, I'd have been be dead in the water, a long time ago.

If I can give back in any way I do, because I know I can't keep what I have, unless I give it away, and that's what makes me strong.

“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” - Ian Maclaren

Saturday, November 14, 2015

Six of Pentacles - What's Your Code of Ethics?

This is a card of generosity, harmony and faith. When I ask myself what it means to me, it is generousity of spirit, and of heart, with great compassion. Sounds simple enough, but often difficult, for a number of reasons.

I've long had the opinion that human beings can make a religion out of any thing,  and it can have nothing to do with spirit, heart or compassion.

There have been many posts on social media in response and reaction to the massacre in Paris, many very positive and some negative. The most positive I saw today is at the heart of this spirit of compassion and  relates directly to having a code of ethics, and I think these are very wise words to live by, regardless of your religion. It is my belief you can't have religion without a code of ethics that aspires to a greater good, and promotes true peace.


1. Rise with the sun to pray. Pray alone. Pray often. The Great Spirit will listen, if you only speak.
2. Be tolerant of those who are lost on their path. Ignorance, conceit, anger, jealousy and greed stem from a lost soul. Pray that they will find guidance.
3. Search for yourself, by yourself. Do not allow others to make your path for you. It is your road, and yours alone. Others may walk it with you, but no one can walk it for you.
4. Treat the guests in your home with much consideration. Serve them the best food, give them the best bed and treat them with respect and honor.
5. Do not take what is not yours whether from a person, a community, the wilderness or from a culture. It was not earned nor given. It is not yours.
6. Respect all things that are placed upon this earth – whether it be people or plant.
7. Honor other people’s thoughts, wishes and words. Never interrupt another or mock or rudely mimic them. Allow each person the right to personal expression.
8. Never speak of others in a bad way. The negative energy that you put out into the universe will multiply when it returns to you.
9. All persons make mistakes. And all mistakes can be forgiven.
10. Bad thoughts cause illness of the mind, body and spirit. Practice optimism.
11. Nature is not for us, it is a part of us. They are part of your worldly family.
12. Children are the seeds of our future. Plant love in their hearts and water them with wisdom and life’s lessons. When they are grown, give them space to grow.
13. Avoid hurting the hearts of others. The poison of your pain will return to you.
14. Be truthful at all times. Honesty is the test of ones will within this universe.
15. Keep yourself balanced. Your Mental self, Spiritual self, Emotional self, and Physical self, all need to be strong, pure and healthy. Work out the body to strengthen the mind. Grow rich in spirit to cure emotional ails.
16. Keep yourself balanced. Your Mental self, Spiritual self, Emotional self, and Physical self, all need to be strong, pure and healthy. Work out the body to strengthen the mind. Grow rich in spirit to cure emotional ails.
17. Make conscious decisions as to who you will be and how you will react. Be responsible for your own actions.
18. Respect the privacy and personal space of others. Do not touch the personal property of others, especially sacred and religious objects. This is forbidden.
19. Be true to yourself first. You cannot nurture and help others if you cannot nurture and help yourself first.
20. Respect others religious beliefs. Do not force your belief on others.
21. Share your good fortune with others. Participate in charity.

" A man's true wealth is the good he does in this world "

                                        - Mohammad

Friday, November 13, 2015

The Chariot - Do I Have a Discerning Balance?

I can't remember the last time I drew The Chariot. This is a card of balance, power, energy and discernment.

 Lately I have been doing a lot of praying for others, and for myself. I think many times the best prayers are for others, and prayers of thanksgiving. I know too I need to say prayers for myself. Mostly that my will be aligned with the God of my understanding. But sometimes I have to ask for help when I am up against it, and I have done all that I can do, and so I pray.

 The Chariot reminds me that when we are being pulled and pushed in different directions, we have to decide what we can and cannot do. Maintaining our focus on keeping our balance is perhaps all we can do even though we may feel and know that anything can happen. This is the way life is, and many of us try to simply keep our heads above water, or the struggles and hardships we have endured can give us strength to rise above, becoming better people, and we can help others in return, for what has been so freely given to us.

 I know that more often than not I can't often control what happens, but I can control how I respond to it. These days gratitude and having a sense of humour, is I think my default in life, and it really does help to keep things in perspective whatever else happens or is going on around me, and that doesn't have to dictate my behaviour and I can use discernment.

Monday, November 9, 2015

Six of Wands - I Need a Professional!

We all have a basic need for recognition. But sometimes you just have to give yourself some positive affirmations for a good effort done, no matter how big or small the job, and no matter if it's far from perfect, because there might not be anyone else around to tell you, hey that's a good effort!

The Six of Wands speaks of this recognition and simultaneously needing to remember their are still challenges ahead to overcome, and accomplishments to be made in the days to come.

I had to patch up my ceiling, and I mean patch, in a back room were there was a lot of draft coming in, and I needed to get it fixed before the Winter arrives.

Oh boy, I don't even try to be miss fix it, but I do what I can, and it will have to do, until I can afford to get my ceiling fixed.  I am waiting on hearing about a home heating grant.

When you are single, you have to either do it yourself, or depend on someone else's help, and this can be very frustrating, discouraging and humbling on so many levels. And so, whatever I can get done,I do it sooner, or later. But it isn't always easy, and there are a lot of things I just can't fix. If any one could see my ceiling right now, they'd laugh, but hey, the draft is gone! Well most of it any way.

I just came in from the mail. I found a letter in my mail box with some very encouraging news that I really needed to hear! I will be getting a home energy grant to get my ceiling fixed! In the meantime I'm glad I managed to do an amateur "fix up", for now until I can get it my ceiling repaired, cause I need a professional!

Sunday, November 8, 2015

Ace of Swords - It's A Movement


Yesterday I was sent a link to watch a movie free of charge from The Red Temple. I watched Things We Don't Talk About, which is about The Red Tent/Red Temple movement. I was thrilled, because I had really wanted to see it, but had no way of doing so. It was both very moving and inspiring.

And so, it was fitting that I drew the Ace of Swords today illustrating Athena, the goddess of Justice, with her sword cutting through muddled thought and the mercurial air, with the raw energy of change. 

Athena, being a warrior, gained her power not through violence, but through her intelligence and wisdom. There is now an awakening of our mental powers. She was once considered the mother goddess, and some how got relegated to the virgin goddess. I prefer to think of her as the mother goddess of Justice, with her scales being equally balanced between wisdom and intelligence.
The Ace of Swords augers change in one's life, that can often threaten the old order. We are however urged to let go of old habits, and to invite change in spite of ensuing struggle.

Like Athena The Red Tent or The Red Temple, encourages us to reclaim our inherent power, via a " state of mind ". It is the way of the woman warrior, on the front lines of a grass roots movement, that has always seen women gather from the beginnings of time.  And with this new state of mind comes freedom, and with freedom, comes responsibility.

“The ‘Red Tent’ is many things to many people. It is a womb-like red fabric space, it is a place where women gather, it is an icon, and it is a state of mind—all concepts inspired by Diamant's book.” –Isadora Gabrielle Leidenfrost, PhD.

 “A circle of women may be the most powerful force known to humanity. If you have one, embrace it. If you need one, seek it. If you find one, for the love of all that is good and holy, Dive in. Hold on. Love it up. Get naked. Let them see you. Let them hold you. Let your reluctant tears fall. Let yourself rise fierce and love great. You will be changed. The very fabric of your Being will be altered by this. If you allow it. Please, Allow it.” ~ Author Unknown

Friday, November 6, 2015

Demystifying The Tarot Reader

Do any of you remember Miss Cleo? She use to be on late night TV. She was one of the worst so called Tarot reading psychics that really got on my nerves, because I knew this was nothing but a scam..  I guess I watched it every now and again when I couldn't sleep. I found it to be pretty much bad theatre it was so ridiculous and she was so over the top.

This was many years before I 'd ever even been introduced to Tarot, but it wasn't  rocket science to figure out it was all fake, and unfortunately there were many that were duped before the show finally went off the airwaves, never to be seen again.

It's people like Miss Cleo or whatever her name was, she had many aliases, that give those authentic and honest individuals who are ethically study metaphysical matters, a really bad rep, which contributes to the kind of destructive myths and misconceptions surrounding Tarot readers, that can be very damaging.

And so it's a good thing to demystify, and deconstruct these myths and untruths. It's also good advice to use  discernment in choosing your own Tarot reader, before deciding to go ahead and have a reading done, because there are many in this world who's intentions do not reflect a professional integrity.

I have found meeting other Tarot readers and getting to know their personalities, one of the fascinating aspects of Tarot. Something else that I have found out, is that some Tarot readers usually have a real interesting story to tell about how they came to be Tarot readers.

The personalities of Tarot card readers are as varied as a deck of Tarot cards. Most that I have met are honest, regular and exceptional folk, empathetic, creative, intuitive, perceptive and intelligent individuals. They have a good sense of humour and are thick skinned philosophers, who love people, and are humble.

Today I learned about one such Tarot reader who wrote an article for the New York Times by the name of Jessa Crispin, She shares her story of how she became a Tarot reader, and I really appreciated her candid, entertaining and very human introduction into the world of Tarot.

We all have a story to tell whether it be our life story or how we became Tarot readers. What's your story?

Thursday, November 5, 2015

Page of Pentacles - Finding Emotional Security

This young Page of Pentacles is gently holding one very large golden pentacle in his hands, depicting a hopeful future and represents all good things of the earth.

We all are in search for emotional security and we need to have hope in our lives, with the realization we can make our own destiny in finding happiness in life. In doing so, it doesn't mean we naively go through life with blinders over our eyes, without taking into serious consideration the struggles and difficulties in life. We all know times in our lives when we experience the dark night of the soul, until the light comes.

The message this young page brings is the encouragement to care and nurture ourselves in a gentle manner and to have a patient approach. It's often referred to as learning to re-parent ourselves.

People, places and the accumulation things outside ourselves does not bring us emotional security or happiness. If we can have our basic needs met, then we have much to be grateful for, and having an attitude of gratitude is what brings a deep, true, and lasting emotional security and happiness. If we need help, we need to ask. This is all part of caring for ourselves.

Tuesday, November 3, 2015

Knight of Swords - How To Be Your Own Heroine/Hero

Many years ago I got my SCUBA certification. When the idea was first presented to me, I wasn't a willing participant, and made excuses why I couldn't possibly do this, because well I was afraid, though I loved the water, and swimming. It was free training through the military, and so in spite of my reservations and reluctance, I went ahead and before I knew it, I was enrolled. It was hard work and we were really put through our paces, with  a lot of challenging tests.

Bar none, the biggest test for me was overcoming my panic. What can kill divers is panic. I think this can be related to pretty much everything in life. And so this was made very clear to us at the very start, that we had to get a hold of our panic. When we did our open water dive with our instructor, this is what he was looking for in our eyes, panic.

I was able to overcome my fear by taking control of my panic, and after several weeks of rigorous training, I finally got my certification. I can't exactly explain how I did this, but I know it was about facing fear head on. And I'm sure all that breathing into a regulator attached to my oxygen tank, and being underwater puts everything into slow motion. All you hear is the sound of your breathing, which is very meditative, and you're in the zen zone.

 It wasn't that fear was absent, but I refused to let it it control me. I was stubborn, and began to instinctively look on this as an opportunity for personal growth.

The Knight of Swords portrays the twins, Castor the mortal, and Polydeuces the Divine. It's a card of courage, adventure and change. Having a sense of adventure and being open to change can make us better people. When we can temper our intuition/emotion with our rational/intellectual mind and visa versa, this can help us to be aware of our behaviour and our mortal and divine nature.

By not allowing ourselves to be ruled by our reactions to situations when the old monkey brain kicks in, creating a scenario of fight or flight, we can gain control of ourselves.
 Learning how to SCUBA dive was a really important life changing lesson. I learned how to have courage, and to be open to change.
 Getting out of our comfort zone, and doing the things that we often afraid of, is what enables personal growth. This has been my own personal experience, time and time again.

Learning how to be our own heroine or hero is one of the best things we can do for ourselves. Sometimes it's a matter of saving ourselves from ourselves.

Monday, November 2, 2015

Three of Wands - You're Not Finished Yet

The Three of Wands is a card of completion. Today for me it is a card of forgiveness in the form of patience and compassion, toward others and ourselves.

 Sometimes it can be hard to know what to do when people do you wrong. I know I need to be willing to make amends, and to have forgiveness toward others, but perhaps the hardest thing, is to have forgiveness toward myself.

Here we see Jason who has returned from Iolkos. King Pelias is kneeling at his feet, who has usurped Jason's position as King and stole his crown while he was away. He humbly offers back the crown to Jason.

We forgive another for ourselves, not for those who have hurt us in one way or another. Once we do that what then? We are not finished with this process. There will always be someone who personally affronts us, and we will always hurt others whether it's intentional or not, including hurting ourselves.

Forgiveness is a healing process that helps us to keep moving forward in a quest for spiritual and creative growth. We need to put action into our intentions whatever they are, otherwise we will stagnate.

There is no room in my mind for guilt, hatred or resentment. I need to try and right the harm or damage I have done for emotional balance, and peace of mind. I need to sweep off my side of the street, and there will be new doors opened. All this takes courage, honesty and humility.

Saturday, October 31, 2015

The Lovers - What's Love Got To Do With It?

Most of us when we see this card our initial reaction might be to have thoughts of romance and all that gooey gushy stuff. I think of it as a card of choice in love and/or chance.

I've have friends say they envy my single life. I can say the same of them sometimes. There are positives and negatives to both lifestyles. Generally speaking I am happy and content on my own. I met my soul mate, my partner, and companion 30 years ago whom I lost to death. If am to never meet another I accept that, because I know he watches over me, until he will stand by me again.

Romantic love is highly idealized in our culture. The media is full of it, and is mostly based on falsehoods and fantasy. Many can't live alone, and don't much like their own company I suspect. The couples that truly understand what it means to be in a loving relationship are few and far between I believe.

It was once explained to me by a spiritual man who was my spiritual mentor, that two individuals come into relationship together as two whole circles, where the creator is central. They intersect, and instead of the circle getting smaller excluding others, it gets bigger expanding to include others in community. It's called our compassion circle.

Compassion Circle

Here's my abstract interpretation of the compassion circle

My last dance with Bill was to Ben E. King's Stand By Me, while he was in hospital. I love this official video of John Lennon's better, and I'm sure Bill would too.

Wednesday, October 28, 2015

Nine of Cups - A Desire In My Heart

As my favourite song writer Bruce Cockburn said in his song about good and bad days, "Some days I walk on diamonds, some days I walk stones. "
It made me feel good today to draw this Wish Card, the Nine of Cups, after spending a few days of anxiety and frustration. It's a good reminder to stay calm, and stop projecting or what I call awfulizing, which is such a waste of energy, and makes things worse.

Being grateful, even when if I feel a dryness or poverty in spirit, and simply having a desire in my heart, or a wish to pray, is a prayer.The desire in your heart is what matters, regardless of what you, or someone else are going through. For me praying is hope actualized

It's easy to get myopic, not seeing the forest for the trees, and getting all caught up in our own problems. We all need to help each other in whatever ways we can.When I can pray for others whether I realize it or not, I can often receive more that what I could ever give. I believe prayer is a very powerful too, no matter how you do it, no matter how you define it. Sometimes the best thing you can do for yourself or for others is pray, and sometimes it's all you can do.

Monday, October 26, 2015

Nine of Pentacles - My Mouse Is Alive!

I drew this card a few days ago, but didn't write a blog post about it, I thought about quite a bit about it's meaning, and just put it back in the deck. Sometimes the relevance of a card doesn't become clear until later. That's what happened here.

We had a planned power outage this morning, which lasted less than half an hour. I had forgotten about it until it went off.

So, I then began to write in my long hand journal with my cup of coffee, while sitting at my computer with no power. I was grateful I'd got my breakfast and coffee before the outage. The next thing I knew I'd knocked over my coffee onto my computer desk. I never impress myself when I do this. Shortly after cleaning that big mess up, the power came back on, only to find I could no longer use my mouse to orient my way around the computer. Argh!

I spent the next following hours booting ( not literally ) as much as I felt like it, and rebooting, reading manuals, etc., when it dawned on me, perhaps I'd drowned my poor mouse in coffee?

I was determined to take my mouse apart, if I could only find a small enough screw driver to loosen the screw that held it together, in attempt to hopefully dry out my mouse. More argh. I couldn't find a small enough tool to get the thing apart. I went into the bibs and bobs drawer to see what I could find. Nothing that would fit, but finally discovered one screw driver. It was perfect! A really handy one my friend had given me a while ago, I'd completely forgotten I had. My friend is a real technological wizard.

 I went from much frustration to hopeful elation. I got it open, cleaned and dried the guts of that mouse. It was pretty gross. Finally I got it snapped back together. and twisted that screw back in where it belonged.

This whole process took me four friggin hours.  But I have to tell you I felt exactly like Daedalus in the Nine of Pentacles. My hard work and determination paid off and I'd resurrected my mouse! I really felt that self-satisfaction that comes with hard work and determination, in spite of my frustration. There's nothing wrong with celebrating your small accomplishments, and to feel proud of yourself. If I can overcome and achieve the small, seemingly incidental things it helps me to believe, and to know I can accomplish more than what I think I am capable of achieving.

 I'm sure I would've  felt differently if my mouse had truly bit the dust. I'd have to accept that, and try to find the best resolution to my problematic dilemma. But in the mean time, I am overjoyed that my mouse is alive, and like Daedalus, I am justifiably pleased with myself with what I was able to achieve, and I appreciate my skill!
I've learned to approach life as an adventure , it's not about the success or failure. It's more often than not been my experience, that I learn more from mistakes.