In the Five of Wands Jason's fighting the big old ugly monster dragon that's guarding the Golden Fleece, but he's got help from his helper and lover Medea. We all need to find that soft place to fall, someone who can help us battle our demons and dragons. We don't have to do it on our own and today I thank God for that.
Life will always find some kind of monster like dragon that stands in our way when we're trying to achieve our goals, but with the help, love and support from those that care and love us, in small or in big ways, this is what makes the difference in overcoming, if we are willing to humbly ask for help, or allow them to help us when they offer.
The other important factor that makes all the difference is my attitude, which has to be a positive one if I'm going to accomplish my goals. And so this New Year I am going to back up my intentions with action instead of simple good intentions which the road to hell can be paved with as we say in the rooms of recovery.
Though I've been sober twenty three 23 years today, I still fight my monsterous dragons, that will never change. It's just called life. Today I live life on life's terms. I fight with myself over my procrastination and lack of motivation, because it's always been all or nothing with me, but I've made a lot progress along the way.
Today I decided I'd go take the hour long walk to my mail box. Understand this can be a real drag for someone who struggles with motivation, especially when it comes to exercising outside in the Winter, because I don't like the cold and I'm just spleeny that way. I've stopped trying to embrace Winter as they say, and just could never get my head around that.
As I started on my walk to the Super Box Mail Dragon, my neighbour picked me up and gave me a lift! I admit I was glad with the cold wind in my face and by the time I got back I was in serious need of using the facilities, which is so much more comfortable in my own house, as opposed to behind a bush in the woods, in the middle of no where.
My mail box used to be directly across the road from my house, but now Canada Post in it's great wisdom, in spite of the numerous protests, decided they know how to "best serve" their customers. Before I get off on a tangent, I'll just say this about that.
I've only been to pick up my mail twice in four weeks since they brought in the new super mail boxes. So instead of seeing this in a negative, I'm trying very hard to see it as a positive. I'll have something to look forward to at the end of my long walk (mail) I hope, like I did today.
I heard it said once, the definition of an alcoholic is someone who always has to have something to look forward too. And if there isn't any mail, I'll be losing some weight and will feel better about myself mind, body and soul. This I know is the right attitude.
I was happy to find Christmas cards and even a Christmas cake from my cousin, who happens to work for Canada Post and also is my mailman, but I won't blame him for that! And who doesn't love Christmas cake ;)
So, I'll to take my own advice. I'll keep asking for help when I need it and I'll be hanging on to that positive attitude while weaving the stuff of spirit and heart into my daily life.