Two of Swords - La La La La I Can't Hear You!

Orestes in the Two of Swords is caught between a rock and a hard place, with his mother, Queen Clytemnestra  on one side and his father King Agamemnon on the other side.

Orestes isn't happy, nor is he unhappy. He can't move or grow, appearing calm enough but just beneath the surface is great tension and anxiety. Orestes has taken the path of least resistance, thinking if he does nothing he won't risk conflict. But the chaos is really between his ears, and is the loudest noise he hears, regardless of what is going on around him. It is the chaos that comes when we refuse to face an impending consequence that calls for us to find a more creative way of handling this situation, instead of deciding to avoid the inevitable.

Listening to our own quiet still voice can be challenging. So how do we do it?
I think the answer varies individually, but the first part of this answer for me comes when there is an acknowledgment and acceptance of the chaos. This chaos can be external or internal, our chaos or someone else's, and we decide to make it ours or not.

There is a saying I love, " not my circus, not my monkeys." In other words this isn't my problem, and it isn't my business.

Learning to detach with love from  people, places and things has been one of the most important life lessons I have learned. It isn't as easy as it might sound and it really does take practice, especially if we've have a pattern of avoiding reality and keeping up with appearances to keep everyone else happy but ourselves. Making a decision to make the first step is the most important. It is so very worth the effort, because it can spare you from a lot of grief and stress.
Ultimately others will benefit from our honesty and so will we. If I have to choose between serenity and storm, I'll choose serenity every time

Four of Pentacles - "The Fear of Loss May Mean No Loss, But Means No gain

"The fear of loss may mean no loss, but means no gain." This is a quote from my Mythic Tarot workbook about the Four of Pentacles. I drew the Three of Pentacles yesterday and discussed professionalism. Today's daily card , the Four of Pentacles has followed naturally, considering the order of things.

 Finding myself without a car for the last month has been difficult, and as per usual my financial situation is always pressing in on the realities of living day to day, and month by month.
I have learned to let people, places, and things go more over the years an especially so these days. My fear of financial insecurity has lessened over the past few months, and though things are certainly not ideal, however if I focus on what I lack and hold on tight, I will be miserable, stressed  and anxious. I have to say I really hate anxiety. This habitual anxious behaviour I can attribute some of it to my early home life, and often being in a state of hyper-vigilance. I am not exactly a nervous Nelly, but I can be an anxious Annie! Undertaking my latest creative project and wanting to do the very best I can, I really cannot afford too much worry, stress and anxiety. Stress blocks my creative energy and my self-expression.

The Four of Pentacles urges me to let go; reminds me I don't have to hang on to fear and anxiety, otherwise it will be very much to my detriment. In light of this, I also understand I need to perceive how I am contributing to this anxiety, and do whatever I can and need to do, to lessen it. This will also enable me to let go. It is easy to tell yourself or someone else, simply to 'let go". It is another thing to actually do it. We are human, and I don't believe that we can ever completely let go, because we all have feelings, and it is next to impossible to stop our feelings. If we could stop all of our feelings, we would no longer refer to ourselves as human 'beings'. Otherwise we would be automatons.

I certainly can detach from my feelings up to a point, but I can never be completely devoid of them, nor would I want to be. Today I honour my feelings, but I don't want them to control me in negative ways, reacting impulsively, instead of responding.

 I strive to make progress not perfection. I need to remember to pause and ask my Creator for space between my impulse and my action.

I would be wise to have the carefree 'trusting in heaven' attitude, living in the present moment approach like  The Fool, as opposed to the controlling, holding on too tight, attached nature of the Four of Pentacles.

The Fool - Egg Tempera on Porcelain Tile, 2015, Catherine Meyers

Note: This photo I took today is of my completed painting of The Fool...lots of more painted marks and goat horns!